To my children
You have just gone to sleep and I am not far behind you, in fact I am writing this letter and then I am getting on the bus to snoozeville. I just wanted to share some thoughts with you whilst you slumber on above my head.
You drive me potty, honestly you really do. I imagine by the time we have completed this journey through motherhood and childhood I will be balding from pulling out my hair, frothing at the mouth from frustration, and quite possibly demented with a nervous twitch.
I adore the three of you, but for goodness sake please twin boy and girl some days could you grow up and not act your age?
Beautiful baby you are excused at this point as at 21 weeks the only think you can do is melt my heart with that amazingly loving smile and your gorgeous gurgle. I can see the mischief hiding behind your eyes but for now lets just be content with adoring each other every moment we can.
But let me turn my attention to you, twin boy and girl, I’d like to correct you on some matters. Last night as I fed beautiful baby I felt a lovely warm feeling wash over me as I heard your peals of laughter drift out of the bathroom. I was coated in pride as I praised my own mothering skills as I heard you clearly sharing and finally ‘playing nicely’ together. Do you think that warm, fuzzy feeling lasted when I realised my extravagant bath cream had been reincarnated as bubbles and the pot it came in was being used as a scoop to empty the bath onto the floor?
Now let me question you once more, although I am trying to teach you to be confident with grown ups and engage in conversation, how do you think mummy felt when after greeting a perfect stranger with a fabulous “hello how are you today?” (Twin girl) you mister twin boy had to go one step further and before the poor fella even had a chance to inhale to reply you chimed in with,
‘Do you feel sad because you are very fat?’
And yes I did say you should never tell lies but maybe you could try to not be so loud with the truth because if I am honest with you I manage to blush from my toes to my fringe when as we walked away hastily you both continued with, ‘but he is fat mummy’ and ‘his tummy is much bigger than yours its enormous’. And to be honest I dont think his excessive waistline meant he had hearing trouble.
While I am on the subject I would also prefer it if you could not turn into tantruming terrors every time my mum comes to stay because hearing ‘they never behave like this for me’ will only hasten my descent into madness. Although on the flip side keep up the good behaviour for nanny as I love it when she says how much fun you have been and how well-behaved you have been.
Now I don’t need you to be angels but just remember this job is paid in kisses and cuddles so on days like today when you have exhausted my last nerve and made me want to call in sick tomorrow just ensure you always do what you did next.
Finish the night as you start every day, find me, hug me and smother me in kisses.
You drive me potty but I love you to pieces,
Sleep tight my troublesome twosome and dream well my three beautiful babies I will see you tomorrow.
Love you,
Mummy
Your little boy’s comments made me laugh – unfortunately kids do have an annoying habit of telling the truth, it doesn’t get any better – this morning eldest son declared that the name my oldest friend had given to her new born son sounded like a name for a dog – thank god she wasn’t here to hear him.
“Are you Sad because you are very fat?” Is pure genius.
Twin boy is clearly going to grow up to be either a counsellor or a stand up comedian.
twin boy gives me grey hairs!
Aww, most of this made me laugh my socks off, and the last little bit just melted my heart. Aww, what a lovely letter 🙂
I’ve also had a day of it today, and my twins are only 10 months old!
got to appeal to the mummies heartstrings x
Call in sick? Are you mad? Office = time to go to the loo by yourself/drink a coffee without it going cold or being knocked over. Home = a post like the one above.
I mean call in sick to the mummy job thing ! am on mat leave from the real work job…
Hahahahaha love it x
Love this! My boy cannot help but comment on perfect strangers in an exceptionally loud voice, I see him mulling his comment, I try desperately to escape…. it is always to late!
hehehe – thanks for giving me a good giggle!