I have hinted in recent posts that beautiful baby whilst being completely adorable is also something of a mastermind and she spends the vast majority of her days sitting quietly twiddling her thumbs contemplating how to better her brother and sister when the opportunity presents itself.
Today was her day.
Twin boy and girl and I finally got to feel fully confident about the school run when we got invited home by one of their friends for our first ever ‘after school play day’. We got to visit someone else’s house to throw their toys, have a few arguments and steal biscuits – clearly we have been accepted. The dog nanny is not yet trusted to look after beautiful baby so clearly we presumed the invite was extended to her as well and off we all trotted; to the rather swish part of town.
All started off well, the children actually played together and a couple of times I witnessed the elusive toy sharing occurring, however baby beautiful was not her usual self. She quickly noticed that the house was devoid of fisher price level toys and was full of dinosaurs, ben 10 and other Mattel and Hasbro related merchandise which all came with a minimum age suggestion of four. This did not seem to go down well with my little beauty who rather likes her multi – coloured activity centres. She seemed unsettled on the spotty blanky I considerately laid out for her to ‘kick’ on and Sophia the teething giraffe was cast aside in disgust as she rolled her eyes at me for choosing such a poor choice of after school venue.
She started to make muffled sad crying noises and her eyes were bright with the suggestion of tears so I scooped her up hoping a cuddle would suffice and once more bring a smile to her rather lovely face. It worked instantly, baby beautiful gave me what can really only be described as a self satisfied grin which then spread into a full grin as a green liquid like substance penetrated through one nappy, one vest, one pair of tights, one mummy top and one mummy pair of jeans.
Yep my daughter pooped on me as punishment for me not taking her to a house with toys for babies.
To make matters worse before leaving the house she had clearly waited for me to turn my back and had magically removed the wipes from my nappy bag leaving me with no way of evening trying to disguise that with ten minutes of arriving a new friends home I was covered in sticky, smelly, yucky poo.
Baby beautiful continued to beam for the rest of our drastically shortened play date.
I dread the toddler stage!
Lol, revenge of the beauty! It is just when you think things are going well that these kids thwart us!
Mich x
Hahahahahaha oh how dare mummy take you to such impoverish surroundings baby! Tut tut mummy.
That right there is why I didn’t leave the house for 6 months. Lol.
Hope you got the green out? I have some vanish if not? Lol
Mary
(@LincolnAndMe)
X
Nice! I guess at least it wasn’t on their soft furnishing – always embarassing.
Scary thought that if you dare thwart her again, your Beauty will turn into the Green Poo Beast once more!
How could you not see the twins dastardly plan? As someone who has all the Columbo dvd watches far too much Agatha Christie (and maybe owns a 3 legged cat called Columbo)! I have deduced that the 2 of them are getting envious of BB so together they plotted her downfall! Whilst twin girl distracted you probably showing you a dance or song twin boy took the wipes out the bag. Twin boy was happy with evil plan however twin girl wanted a real show stopper. When you were at the playdate she was telling BB the story of how she came into the world (which is enough to turn anyone’s poo green)! Scarily enough my niece who is 4 told me a dr puts a huge spoon in your belly button and digs the baby out then buries the spoon in the garden but I digress. Poor BB was framed by the twins pure and simple I rest my case!!!