Is the tooth fairy real? How to lie to your kids…

The little girl with a new gappy smile looked at her mother and prepared to ask a big question,

“Mummy, is the tooth fairy real? Or is it you?”

The question caught her mother off guard momentarily and she assumed her usual confused face which she always had on stand by for when she needed to tell a lie.  Her daughter looked at her and you could see that she was torn between wanting to be old enough to hear the truth, but was also craving the magic that childhood holds.

The mother looked at her seven year old daughter whom she had taught not to lie and realised that she too was not ready to wave goodbye to the fantasy world that all parents create.  She realised to denounce the fairy that collects dead teeth for a living, would also mean crushing Father Christmas, slaughtering Rudolph and boiling the Easter Bunny.

So she beamed and caught her daughters hand, and lied through her own teeth and said,

“Don’t be silly, what does mummy want with your rotton old teeth.”

A wave of relief flooded over the small girl as her world remained intact and she hugged her mother tightly before skipping to the playroom to make a picture for the tooth fairy who would be visiting later that night.

The mother chuckled to herself and resumed the daily grind of washing, cooking, cleaning, working until eventually night fell and she succumbed to sleep.

Sleep however, was not a welcome visitor that evening, the mothers dreams were tiring, she was caught in an knotted handkerchief which caused her to toss and turn all night.

Morning came and she awoke to find her daughter standing by her side, her eyes wet and face distraught.

She held out her hand silently and in her palm lay one small white tooth.

“She didn’t come mummy.” She said through a fresh batch of tears “she didn’t come.”

The mother’s hand shot to her mouth in horror, she had forgotten to exchange the dead body part for a shiny gold coin and her daughter was devastated.

“She must have been busy,” stuttered the shamed parent.

Her daughter crept into the bed and held her mother close.

“Well, maybe mummy,” she said, hiccupping with sadness, “but at least I know it is definitely not you because you would never forget something as important as this.”

The mother turned her face to the wall, embarrassed to be perceived as being so organised by her seven year old child, feeling guilty for blaming a mythical creature for her own mistake and utterly elated that by being an incompetent imbecile she had firmly confirmed her daughters believe in the magical.

The tooth fairy came the next night, she paid double.

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28 thoughts on “Is the tooth fairy real? How to lie to your kids…”

  1. Ah yes the forgotten tooth fairy visit, been there and some how managed to rescue the situation by insisting the money must have fallen out from behind the pillow and ended up in the bed or on the floor somewhere . The resulting search of the bed and beneath with anxious child ( with £1 cleverly concealed in Mamas hand) resulted in the Tooth Fairy’s gift being “found” and the child’s anxiety soothed. Though explaining to the 7 year olds why the 14 yr old sister didn’t get a visit from the tooth fairy ( because they did ask, and the 14 yr old did confirm there was no money ) when her tooth came out, that one we have yet to figure out.

  2. Yes, I’ve done that too! Because tooth had come out at school, managed to convince son that tooth fairy must have been confused, and not sure where to leave money, but would have worked it out by the next evening, which indeed she did! Thought it was a work of creative genius at the time!

  3. Clearly something in the water – we lost our first tooth on Saturday!.

    We didn’t forget though (pause while I pat myself on the back), but I did find myself at midnight wondering, as I still am,

    “what do you do with the teeth?”

    I’ve now got a slightly manky (and surprisingly small) tooth wrapped in a piece of tissue in my knicker drawer. Now what do I do?!

  4. With the first two (children, that is!), I did the same, at first anyway, so there are probably still manky teeth wrapped in tissue in various ‘safe places’ long forgotten! I’m afraid that number three’s teeth have all been unceremoniously binned!

  5. Ha Ha, our lids are reaching the same age. I blogged a very similar story last month. I know Father Christmas is also on very shaky ground this year. Just debating whether to fess up and change the format this year given I know they know and they I know they know!

  6. Oh no! I’ve had to explain to the kids that they needed to look a bit harder on many occasions…. Sadly no-one believes any more in the tooth fairy in this house. Well I don’t know about Smiley, but she swallows all her fallen out teeth anyway, as far as I can tell. I wonder are they nutritious?

  7. Oh I’ve forgotten a few times and yes lied through my teeth. I’m not proud but hey like you say the magic of Christmas is in danger if we tell the truth. My 9 yr old found my stash of teeth a couple of years ago and I lied even more and said that the tooth fairy puts the teeth in a special place for mummy.

  8. I’ve done the same. We also had a special fairy in our house who left a toy under my son’s pillow in exchange for his dummy. Six years later my he’s still not sure whether to believe in that fairy or not.

  9. Awesome. I have yet to fail this particular challenge, but I do know one tooth fairy who forgot 3 nights running and then found she was out of change, so swapped the tooth for a fun-size Milky Way.

  10. Once I was at camp (as a teenager) when one of the younger children lost a tooth, desperate to ensure this was a memorable tooth loss, one of the leaders took it upon themselves to ensure the tooth fair would visit and leave little footprints. Which was something I had never heard of, but apparently before visiting the leaders house, their own tooth fairy would wander through the flour and leave a little trail of fairy feet. However I can only assume it was the partner and not the leader in question who was responsible for this feet as the next morning having been visited by the tooth fairy, the room looked like an explosion in a flour factory.. the fairy hadn’t missed dancing across every solid surface and child’s face! Very funny!!

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