Barbells, CrossFit and not being a fittie

Let’s be clear.

I have never been a fittie.

I am an extremist.

I’ve ran marathons, and I have also done nothing but sit on the sofa for 3 years gaining weight steadily through a diet of pizza and wine.

I’ve eaten clean and I’ve eaten some right shite.

I’ve had little body fat and then on occasion I have had Santa’s fair share of body fat.

I can tell you categorically that my weight doesn’t determine my happiness. Sometimes it impacts my confidence, extra pounds make running harder, but it doesn’t change the smile or frown on my face.

But my fitness does.

If I don’t make it to the gym, I am grouchy, find motivating myself hard, and hate feeling unfit when chasing the kids around.

And nothing compares to the joy of wrapping my hand around a barbell…

I am passionate that every woman at some point should find out what their body can do.  Let it amaze you.  I never thought mine could run 26 miles without stopping – but it did.  I never believed in a million years I could squat my body weight –  and I can – even now after a summer of all the food!

(disclaimer – currently can’t run 26 miles :))

I have an insanely busy life.  It took a long time for me to admit, but raising three kids as a single parent, managing a chronic medial condition that steals sleep trying to fit in different work contracts, pay the bills, keep a relatively clean house, see my friends and family is really bloody hard.  Like everyone, I have moments where I doubt myself, where my sanity seems to be hanging on a thread.

So I go back to the Barbell – because I need that hour for me, that time for reflection, to push myself to a place where I more often that not exceed my own expectations.

I will never be the woman with abs in the gym.

I will never be the fittest.

That isn’t important any more.

No one stands in the corner laughing at me if I fail a lift, no one watches me come last on a workout and tells me to piss off home and never return.

In my chosen fitness plan, CrossFit, the support is unreal, the passion in the room relentless.  No one fails, because we are all there, learning, training, making time, building bodies that are functional in life.

When I touch that barbell, swing that kettlebell, even do that burpee, I know I can be more than I sometimes give myself credit for.

And everyone should feel that way, everyone should have that support network. Everyone should have a chance to believe in themselves.

The moral of this story?

Don’t wait to be fit to join something that scares you.

Don’t wait to be slim to find your fitness.

Don’t worry about failing before you begin.

Don’t play the I don’t have time card, ditch the Netflix series, get up an hour earlier – it is really bloody important.

Exercise offers happy endorphins as a reward for the workout – you will feel mentally and physically better.

For me it is the barbell, what about you?