Thank you all for coming on this terribly sad day,
To mark the occasion of my social life passing away.
It was a culmination of events that led to the death of my outgoing life,
Triggered by having children and becoming a wife.
So let us remember the good times and bad,
When my social life was active, oh what fun we did have.
We used to hang out in bars and dance all night long,
In those days I didn’t have to wear my big knickers as I could get away with a thong.
My social life’s illness started off slow,
Wearing high heels was the first thing to go.
Wild nights out with friends are replaced by family meals down the pub,
But we have to be home before seven to get the kids in the tub.
Evenings out drinking have been firmly cast aside,
As two pregnancies ensures my alcohol tolerance has also died.
Nights at the cinema still happen but quite frankly that’s hell.
Instead of watching the latest blockbuster the last thing I watched was bloody Tinkerbell.
So now my evening consists of playing on facebook and twitter,
We would love to go out but have you seen the price of a sitter?
So social life has croaked out its very last breath,
At just 33 it seems to be such an untimely death.
Get out your tissues and let the tears flow,
My social life is gone its been replaced by nights in with play doh.
I solemnly scatter its remains into the earth,
Looking forward to one day when it will get a rebirth!
Oh yes because when the kids can stay home all alone,
And I can access their every movements using GPS on the phone.
Then ladies and gents we are having a do,
So I will see you down the pub in two thousand and twenty two.
Thanks for coming, please sign the book of condolence in the comments box before you leave.
My condolences… I have vague memories of a social life too. See you in two thousand and twenty two!
Its going to be one hell of a night out! Will try and make it past ten!!!!
I’m so sorry to hear such sad news. I too have succumbed to polar neck knickers. An exciting night involves a chocolate orange. So rock and roll.
The sad thing is, as I read chocolate orange I got excited! Social life still firmly dead
I will come and join you for the eventual big night out! Will be spending my 40th next week doing all the school runs….
Throw in a drop off kids party and a taxi service to dance and swimming lessons and you will have one heck of a time!
My heartfelt condolences, I too have suffered this way.
My birthday night out this year is going to be the school carol concert! A cup of tea & a mince pie in the village hall isn’t exactly cocktails & fine dining……
Hey look on the bright side, its a night out!
I resemble this!
Love it!
In loving memory of your social life, may it rest and peace until it rises from the ashes like a phoenix from the flame! Yeah, I live in hope that mine does the same one day too.
It will we have to have hope! What is parenthood without hope?
I loved reading this. The tinkerbell comment had me sniggering. It all rings a bell, except at 21 years old, and having been either pregnant or breastfeeding constantly since I was just 18 years old, my social life was DOA!
Goodness me! well at least when it returns you will be young enough to enjoy it!
Fabulous. I’m going to the fridge now to grab a glass of wine to toast the death of your social life.
Love it.
Kirsty
My deepest sympathy – drinks are on me next time you head into W1 xxxx
Love it, just love it, fantastic! xx
Ha ha. Fantastic! I don’t think your social life is dead though. Perhaps just in a coma so don’t go and bury it whatever you do!!!!
Oh so sad but true! Kids… Who’d have ’em, eh?! X
I miss my life! x