bad vs good mother

by

I had to avoid a mum in the playground today. She is lovely but when we caught up after october half term she confessed how sad she was to be bringing her three children back to school as they had had such a wonderful time playing together.

Today twin boy told me off for driving too fast on school run, we weren’t late I was eager. Twin girl threw a strop on the pavement outside the blessed building and told me off for pushing her. I hadn’t even realised I was but as I looked down, there was my hand pressed in the small of her back scurrying her along, I apologised, I was just over excited.

So really based on the fact that I would have happily drop kicked my pair through the school gate this morning in my desire for some post christmas peace I didn’t think my friend and I would have much common ground to chat about. Although she could regale me with stories of knights castles they made from scratch using boxes and felts; I could reply with my frustration of trying to remove glitter glue from twin girls head after twin boy bopped her with his home made shiny sword.

She could tell me about the stories they read from all their new books, I could recant the words from most Disney films backwards if needs be.

As we left the gates she would probably be off to ready the house for active play for when they return and spend the afternoon making nutritious wholesome snacks for them to eat after school. Me? I am off home to sit on the sofa in blessed silence, then I will attempt to remove blue tack from the stairs and finally I will forget to take any snack to school when I go to get them out on bail for the night.

Still that’s better than my original idea of sitting of the sofa with a flask of gin! I realised that the teachers seem to frown upon drunk mothers collecting children so will have to wait for 3.20 to open that baby!

I love school!

P.S.

Did you know I am running a marathon to raise much needed money for The Anthony Nolan Trust after my neighbours little boy battled with leukaemia? Please sponsor me here http://www.justgiving.com/Jane-Blackmore because my legs hurt, i am tired and every penny goes towards saving a life.

Thank you

32 thoughts on “bad vs good mother”

  3. I have a cousin who often made me feel the same way , she would get so upset about schools starting back and it made me feel rotten . Not to mention all the fun (expensive) stuff she and the kids were doing .

    She loves the holidays because she gets to spend time with her kids because every weekend they spend at first her mums then her ex . So she gets from Friday evening till Sunday evening off each week -no wonder she likes holidays.

    All in my book kids really need is love , hugs and plenty of kisses – do you do that ? Then your a great mum

  4. Another Selfish Mummy (see my post from yesterday…) Blige I was happy to see my two disappear into nursery today, the only thing I can add to dim that happiness was 3 hours is soooo not enough!

  5. When I took MiniMe (no really, she is, it’s quite scary…except it means she can’t put anything past me and I am always one step ahead!) back for the first day of term this morning, I smiled quietly at the palpable relief in the playground…I saw mothers practically skipping. By 3.05pm I might quite like the little thing back again, but for the moment, I am quite enjoying not having to explain my every move and having someone constantly answer back every time I speak (umm…did I say she took after me?!), at which point I embark on intelligent reasoning before the moment dawns and I stop mid-sentence, spluttering: “Wait a minute. You’re SIX, you don’t get to discuss this! This is what Mummy says. Full stop. End of. Accept it. You little F*****.” Well okay, maybe the last comment just happens in my parallel dream world, but you get the jist.

    Love to all! Happy New Year (and Term)!

    E x

    http://philosopher-without-a-cause.blogspot.com/

  8. Thanks for the giggle. I felt much the same way this morning dropping my daughter off at school. I love school, thankfully so does the munchkin 🙂

  9. It always makes me sad that people measure themselves about what another parent says they do. For a start, a truly bad parent does really terrible things to their kids – or does nothing at all – and so I don’t regard what you did as bad parenting. The other woman just has a different style, that’s all. And then there is the matter of what reality in her house IS actually like. They may have done those things but I bet it wasn’t all serenity and Waltons.We label ourselves bad parents because of the judgemental way the media portrays parenting today but really, as long as kids are happy, clothed, fed, warm and loved, it matters not a jot whether you pushed them through the door or you stood at the school gate crying cos you missed them.

    I blogged about this back in September.

    http://thefivefsblog.blogspot.com/2010/09/parenting-bluffers-guide.html

    I know you were being funny, but some people reading it will think “I felt like that, does that make me a bad mother?” and the vast majority are so not. Anyone who says parenting is easy is lying. I suspect your friend has her own trials but doesn’t let on to them.

    • Thanks for the comment kate, I agree some people would read this not in the humourous way it was certainly intended. My friend is pretty much the epitome of perfect and I love her for it.

      Parenting is the hardest job in the world and we all struggle with it.

      But yes my theory is to love them and laugh at myself!

      Xxx

  10. Excellent,I love it!

    I would have been right there with you this morning only Billie’s school had an inset day today however along with Bills we skipped down the road to Crawshay pre-school to drop Sam off only to find the door locked and nobody in sight. I could of cried there and then with the disappointment!

    Billie was heart broken to have her special mummy time shattered in front of her eyes! Her words not mine.

    X

  12. ha ha brilliant!

    i don’t know who was more excited about pre-school starting back, me or Betty. She was out of the house like a shot, and I had a very peaceful day on the sofa with the gin

    (no, just kidding)

  14. Ha ha, Great post as always!!

    I would have skipped to nursery and back again yesterday were it not for the b**stard administrators who closed it on Christmas Eve (with no notice to any of the parents and told the fantastic staff 3 days before Christmas they were redundant) and the lovely Council who refused to take over the running of it!

    Instead me and little miss spent what would have been our cleaning morning (yes she does enjoy it, really!) listening to little man shouting, “No, no, don’t, don’t” Such fun 🙂

  16. Oh Jane ! Your life sounds so much like mine. I’m totally slummy but firmly believe deep down, behind closed doors everyone is!!
    I too was running the marathon nxt year til a hernia op put paid to that for this year.
    My goal is to get back into running asap!
    Lay off the gin sweetie xx

  17. A woman after my own heart! I nearly cried today when the snow came down, praying that school wouldn’t close! The snow is now melted and school has remained open. Role on Monday! Great post, made me smile. Thanks!

  19. If I tape boxes onto Tori’s shoes so she’s taller do you reckon I could sneak her into school this term? I’m sure she’d pass for a small, slightly under-developed 3 year old…

    I am jealous of your gin, mostly because I’m not allowed any due to Bump but would really like some to help me see the funnier side of baked beans rubbed into the kitchen carpet… (whoever it was that designed our kitchen with a carpet was an idiot and clearly didn’t have children at the time…)

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