a bin full of placenta and patience

Anyone selling patience?

Anyone?

I need some; the last of mine was clearly mixed up in the after birth when bb was bornΒ and was chucked in the bin with all the other bits and bobs that fell out after my third child escaped the womb.

In fact should anyone stumble upon the bin containing my placenta and patience please have a good rummage as I reckon my bladder control could be in there too.

So can I buy some? I was running low before bb arrived but the four days a week I spent in the office meant I was able to use it more efficiently. Now I am at home all day I feel I need to find a wholesaler so I can purchase in bulk or maybe I could buy some industrial strength seeds and grow a patience plant?

Everything seems to irritate me, listening to twin boy eat his cereal this morning put my nerves on edge for the rest of the day. They are not even that naughty but if you combine their incredibly loud shrieks and squeals with my loss of patience you clearly have a volcanic situation on your hands.

I have tried relaxing music, it annoys me; in fact in seems to ignite violent tendencies as I start imagining what I can beat with a pan pipe.

I have tried running to de stress (I am even running a marathon) but still even when I step foot back in my happy home it takes one wail from a arguing twin and my blood pressure rises to boiling point in a millisecond.

So please have a heart should you have any spare patience please throw it my way. All this shouting isn’t good for my throat and I suspect the kids are tiring of it too.

Please note I have found gin to be a good substitute for patience so should you not wish to give of yours I will happily accept a bottle of the good stuff instead.

Thanks in advance

24 thoughts on “a bin full of placenta and patience”

  1. That relaxing music makes me feel really agitated. I suspect either a typo or someone playing some kind of mean trick on us.

    Patience I would happily give you, but sorry, I have none left.

  2. I am right there with you on this post, ousts to have the patience of a saint until the bugger took it back – curse that saint!! In the last few weeks I have turn into mega agouti mummy! Don’t get me wrong I have always shouted, just not all the time but these days it happens at least once, mostly twice, sometimes three or four and what upsets me the most is that my baby boy doesn’t even flinch when I’m shouting at his sister because already he is accustomed to it and that’s just not right πŸ™

    Sod it, pass the gin I don’t mind sharing if you don’t? X

  3. Sorry, no patience. We were hoping that Bubs might be the one person that had some in our house, but it’s looking doubtful! Today I thought my head was gonna fly off and bounce down the road! I’m having a large G+T as soon as OH gets home!

  4. My small girl drives me to the edge – we aree too similar I think! If you find where to get the patience from let me know. In the meantime have resorted to the white wine tonight!

  5. Earlier this week I had a bit of a meltdown. My patience has been wearing thin all week. Someone told me to make sure I take some time out for myself. Could you get away for a girly lunch, a bit of shopping, a spa day? Everyone deserves a bit of me time x

  6. Oh i love this, you sound like a woman after my own heart!
    Thank you for looking at my blog – i have moved the subscribe button to the top so hopefully easier now? Would apprieciate the support

    Great blog
    xx

    Evey (PolythenePram)

  7. I lost mine somewhere back in the middle ages. If I ever find it again I’ll split it with you, can’t say fairer than that. Ice and a slice with my G&T if you’re getting a round in. Ta.

  8. What is this patience thing you speak of? I’ve never had any at all lol!

    I don’t have any gin, but there’s some Bailey’s in the kitchen – will that do?

  9. I just wrote a blog post about feeling a bit schizo today – schizo sunday. I didn’t need you as you’ve phrased it all so much better than I could write it down. I have no patience left in me. They have wrung it out of me. I’m taking to me bed. And it’s not even 9pm.

    As ever, I’m eternally grateful for the day I found you blog.
    Worshipfully yours, L

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